Sometimes I’ll get a guy on the site who will email me constantly. It’s almost a compliment, but in reality I am just not interested in them. If I was I’d message them back within the first or second introduction.
Sometimes I feel bad or it becomes a nuisance so I answer them and just say “I’m not interested, but I appreciate the compliment. I wish you the best of luck”
That phrase alone I thought I crafted beautifully. It’s not mean or specific or insulting. It’s straight to the point. And yet they continue on. Or I get called nasty names.
Which brings me to the message I get most often; “guys who have huge cocks and inexplicably want to ruin my guts with it”. I’m really not into huuuuuuuge dicks I rather like them medium sized and thick or leaner and long. I have one rule. It’s it’s too big to get past my tonsils it’s probably too big for my pussy. So to these guys I’m always upfront. Look man I just can’t take that much meat. To which they always reply “I’ll take it nice and slow”.
Men who own dogs are 100% more attractive to me. Maybe it’s because owning a dog means so many things to me. Usually you have to be caring, sympathetic and the best of all intuitive to own a dog. And when you meet a man and see how he treats them he becomes way more endearing. Does anyone else feel that way?
I like you more then you know
And yet I will probably never tell you this
Because I know what we are
And I know our limitations
And yet when you smile at me
Or laugh at my jokes
Or kiss me so sweetly
I imagine things
But then reality slaps me back to consciousness
And I realize I hardly know you
Beyond the facts
Beyond the smile
You’re just a feeling
Something not rational
Something not real
Nothing solid beneath us
Only clouds above us
It isn’t a surprise then
That I always feel like I’m floating
When I’m with you.
Lately I’ve been up and I’ve been down
I’m doing great things for myself
Becoming a new me, a better me
I feel confident in who I am
But loneliness always rears it’s ugly head
And instead of feeling accomplished and whole
I feel like I’m only a half
Waiting for someone
Waiting for a feeling
Waiting to be happy-er
I want someone to grow with
To care for
To be a partner to
To see the same future
And I know I won’t find such a man on this site
But you’d think I’d find someone
And the men I do come in contact with
Don’t think I’m good enough material
Because I’ve fucked around “too much”
But what does it matter
When I know I’m a good person
Sometimes while sitting in traffic I’ll compose a thought or two, but the same thing always happens. I get caught up while coming home and forget half the lines I’ve written in my head. SO by the time I commit these things to stroke and key, it comes out jargled and bits and pieces are missing like an incomplete puzzle
I feel as though I’ve kept up the facade of being consistently happy
No one wants to know the sad me
And if they did, would they reject me?
Even some of my closest friends don’t know me completely
I’ve been so good at being good
That they don’t know how bad I’ve really been
Do they care to know? I haven’t found anyone that inquisitive
I don’t think people want to know other people’s complexities
it’s so much simpler to be simple, basic, monotone.